Anacondas - The Hunt For The Blood Orchid (DVD)

Anacondas - The Hunt For The Blood OrchidLabel: Sony PicturesDescription: Sequel to the 1997 actioner 'Anaconda'. A pharmaceutical company sends a group of horticulturalists on a scientific expedition to Borneo in search of a rare flower - the Blood Orchid - that can reputedly bestow immortality. But the group are alarmed to discover that the precious plant is being guarded by a terrifying population of bloodthirsty anacondas who have been imbibing the orchid's restorative properties for years - making them faster and stronger than ever. So here's the deal: A bunch of sassy scientific types who all look as though they've spent just as much time lifting barbells as they have beakers head out into Borneo to find a rare flower that's the pharmaceutical equivalent to the fountain of youth--and end up dodging the digestive system of several mutant snakes during mating season. You gotta hate when that happens. If you don't you soon will because this in-name-only sequel to Anaconda 1997's now seminal guilty pleasure is proof that more does not necessarily mean merrier. The thing isn't even good-bad; it's cheap and completely unmemorable even as popcorn fodder. Director Dwight Little and his posse of screenwriters have neither the budget nor the imagination to come on like a rip-snorting Aliens clone--its pretty much one snake at a time and frankly more concerned with the conniving British baddie (Matthew Marsden) who really really wants that orchid. The cast of no-names is destined to remain that way although the chiselled Johnny Messner as a rugged jungle guide provides a few hoots in his laughably stoic attempt at Vin Diesel-dom. It's hard to determine who youd like eaten first. --Steve Wiecking